There are 2 choices, 2 votes for mynameishoneybee's debate

is it deja vu?

  • deja vu...

    what is the biggest emotional mistake of your life? by this i dont mean killing someone, jumping off a cliff, losing all your money, etc., but your most significant *emotional* misstep. is there something you made a conscious decision to do based on feelings that still haunts you today? is it even remotely possible that given the opportunity, you would conduct the same screw-up now? people seem to love to say "if only i knew then what i know now".. but does it even make a difference? it is a fact that people learn new things every day, and that humans adapt to new situations. what i want to know though, is whats doing the learning.. the brain or the heart?

    take for instance, a person (X) who cares too much. as we all know, that can very easily be a fatal flaw. so X lives life, caring about what everyone thinks and trying to help everyone out. in the process of doing so, X becomes vulnerable to alot of things, because other people are asses and take advantage of ones who give. X gets hurt, over and over again. finally, it appears that X's *brain* learns a lesson, and builds up a tolerance to the cruelty. this tolerance is manifested by an outer facade, a shield to society if you will. X now lives life in a bubble -- finds that its safer, but damn its uncomfortable. years pass, and the bubble gets weaker and weaker from people beating on it. finally, one day, someone special breaks through. one of two things can now happen. the person is truly great, and they go on their merry way. OR.. the person is well disguised but nonetheless still another ass, and X gets to do this all over again, feeling even shittier. the brain knew better, but the *heart* ultimately opened the door. again.

    so it seems to me that a heart never truly learns, it can only avoid. once confronted, it reacts the same every time, because a heart by definition consists of the entire emotional essence of a person -- which does not change. so whats the point then if no one can really learn anything? is life just a giant lottery? the lucky ones keep on hitting, while the others just continually miss? kind of a shitty deal. it seems that more and more people these days are running around in circles trying to figure out why they keep driving over the same potholes.

    this is what i think.

    stop believing that your heart can learn. accept the fact that yes, you have been hurt before, and that you will probably be hurt in the future as well. embrace the possibility that someone could fuck you over.. again. erase the notion that you can control how you feel. people that think emotions can be reined in by sheer willpower are setting themselves up for a huge disappointment -- their happiness will be entirely dependent on luck.

    *stop* the brain from learning. by that, i mean stop your brain from doing things to protect your heart. funny thing. the only thing that people truly fear on earth is pain. perhaps not necessarily physical pain, but mental pain is programmed to be avoided at all costs. we all fear it, and we've all felt it. but an even funnier thing about pain is that it makes you feel alive. it is, very much so, a confirmation of existence. by letting the pain in, you know that you have been true to yourself. by feeling sorrow, you know you really gave a shit.

    if you never really give a shit, you *are* hopeless.

    stop being so bitter and live your life... that bubble doesnt look good on you.

    Voted for by mynameishoneybee.
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  • Nah

    Thanks but no thanks

    Those other times leading up to falling for it again and making me feel shittier save you from falling for countless others. And you'll be even MORE careful the next time.

    Voted for by Weydon.
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