There are 6 choices, 6 votes for Ievianty's debate

Why is divorce considered wrong?

While I mostly hear it from religions, I also hear it from some people that say divorce is wrong and that a married couple should always stick together. I really don't understand why, after all, not everything works out in life and marriage is one of them. The divorce rate is so high it must mean something. How are two people suppose to stay together no matter what and why?

While I never been part of a marriage myself, my parents got divorced and I was there for it. My father is at fault here for so many reasons. He had some children (I don't know how many) that he basically acted like didn't existed and kept that knowledge hidden from others. He cheated on my mother, like if she was away from a few days or he would be on the phone a lot with other women. He forced me to go out with him during the time he was moving away and even got into a custody battle, just to look good in front of the rest of the family (not so much cared about me) who believed him and thought my mother and sisters had gone crazy. He was like their perfect angel. He even molested both my older sisters when they were just babies and of course, denied it when the truth finally came out many years later. So many lies...

I'm sure there are far worse cases. This isn't meant to be my life story, but rather, to give insight on why "divorce is wrong" is something I don't buy into and having a really hard time seeing that point of view. My mother was suppose to somehow stay with a man who disowned some of his children, cheated, lied a lot, and even molested his own daughters (not to mention denied all of this)? They were both fed up with each other (my mother after finding out those things and getting pass love blindness), so what were they suppose to do, make up? For those who believe divorce is wrong, why should they have stayed together, why should my mother have stayed with that man?

I don't mean for this to sound so personally, but I felt throwing out an example from my own experiences would lead to a deeper discussion of why divorce is wrong, even with those type of people out there like my father.
  • foundation
    I personally dont think that it is wrong. I think people grow and change and do stupid stuff and at some point love cant even help it. I do think though that sometimes people rush into marriage thus ending in divorce because they never built a foundation. Like with a house.Without the foundation every thing will fall. There are many reasons for divorce and my mother divorced her first husband because he was quite the colorful character. I dont really think there is a bad reason for divorce unless you get married super fast or while your drunk or something like that. Then you need smacked.
    Voted for by Stepherz804.
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  • this is meant with divorce is wrong
    divorces shouldnt happen it hurts most of all the children... what is wrong with it is how often it happens. marriage fails so much for one simple reason... ppl arent getting married cause they want to be with this only person for teh rest of their lifes but because it seems like its the next best thing to do. that is whats wrong. that ppl are stupid enough to hurt others leading to divorce. divorce itself is both wrong cause it shouldnt have happened and good because its the best thing to get that partner which only hurts and does nothing for the happiness of his/her family which is what should matter.
    Voted for by pnktrky.
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  • Should be avoided
    If possible but... My parents were divorced and I now feel as an adult that this was for the best. They would never have got along if they had stayed together thus causing me more pain. It is important that the parents remain mutual as much as possible and teach the children how to behave responsibly and deal with things in a respectful and considerate manner. If the child/ren are taught tolerance and maturity and can see the parents are working together for the best for everyone they will have respect for their parents abilities to do whats right for the whole family be they together or not.
    Voted for by Applehead.
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  • Marriage is Wrong
    Marriage is wrong, so divorce is wronger. Marriage is a contract to force two people to possess eachother. If one tries to leave, then the other sues.

    Marriage is based on fear, not love. Relgion is based on fear, hence they are all for marriage which is ironic because Catholic priests couldn't hold a relationship with a woman if their lives depended on it. That is why they fail and cloak themselves with a white collar so they hide their shame. Ask any priest. They never got laid in real life.

    As for you denouncing your father, I caution you not to do so because you do not know what your father is feeling inside. If either he cannot communicate his true feelings and/or you are not listening then you could be making him out to be demon when, perhaps, he had all right to do what he did. When you get older you will start to understand the differences between men and women.

    Also, do some research. Deep research into older kids accusing their father of molestation. Most of it is false. I'm not saying that he did not, but most likely than not, he DID NOT abuse his kids. That is a story your sisters invented to deal with their own pathologies.

    In the end, I hope you realize people do the best with what they know and are conditioned.

    Forgive your father so you can get on with your life. You destroy your future by holding a grudge against a man you do not understand.
    Voted for by Brew Kline.
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  • Petejones read Mudgods reply
    I also have the strongs concordance, but I also have a Hebrew concordance and doctor of theology and languistics as a close friend. Hebrew marriage contract is permanent. It is called a Ketubot

    Divorce is not wrong by itself. It is only wrong, when done for the wrong reasons.

    Divorce is not preferred by God, but if you feel that the adulterous counterpart, did permanent damage and is un-remorseful, a writ of divorce can be made.

    Divorce is only a sin, when it's done for the wrong reasons.

    We must remember, that marriage and divorce are both religious concepts.

    If you are married and not a Christian, then it should not be called a marriage at all, IMO. It should be called a non-religious union.

    Marriage comes from the Hebrew word. It is actually a Hebrew concept originally and modern society has embraced the Hebrew translation of legal marriage in nearly all of our modern countries.

    Marriage is about vows. To vow means to promise something forever with no clauses or excuses allowed.

    Marriage is a covenant, between God, husband and wife together.

    The only Scripture in the Bible where you actually find the word 'covenant' used in direct relationship to marriage is at the closing of the former testament. In response to man's cry as to why the Lord will not accept his weeping and tears, the prophet says, "Because the Lord has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant." (Malachi 2:14)

    Yes, if you treat your wife badly(as a Chrisatian husband) your prayers will not be answered.

    Pete: your mother and father did what was necessary and your mother is not in the wrong there and neither are you or your siblings(if you have them).

    Your Father should never remarry!!!!!! This is VERY VERY important, because all of his unions after breaking a permanent covenant are cursed and the Bible does describe this curse, as death. Although difficult to prove, because death is a natural and constant occurrance, there is still striong evidence that, a death in some form, does occur shortly after the breaking of vows.

    The death could be physical or spiritual or even his new wife or new children. I promise you Pete, as I sit here and write this, your father must ask forgiveness and NEVER re-marry, or face the consequence of death, in some form. I have documented proof that this occurrs many times and have personally felt the sting of this curse in my own parents and many other couples I know personally.

    Sorry to sound so scary, but I have strong faith in my God and His Word.

    Your mom is A OK Pete. Your father left her no alternative.
    Voted for by frndofyaweh.
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  • It is wrong to me...
    ...because when you get married, you are supposed to know that you are basically agreeing to spend THE REST OF YOUR LIFE with that person, NO MATTER WHAT. 'Til death do you part! If you don't want that, then don't marry them! If you don't think you will end up having problems, and you do get problems, well...you said "I do" to staying together until death, so don't go back on your word! I know there are 'good reasons' to getting divorced, but I really think that nobody should get married if they're just going to end up divorcing.

    My parents got divorced, and I suppose it was for those 'good reasons', but I don't see why they ever were married in the first place.

    If you aren't willing to work through problems, no matter how tough the problems are, then don't get married.
    Voted for by Benedictum.
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